No Foreign Lands

So hey there,

I’m sure you’ve been wondering why I haven’t been posting about my summer plans with Noah… The great, big, right-before-he-leaves summer plans.

Me with my Grandma at the top of the Thüringer Warte (a big-ish tower in Franconia)

Well, first of all, I spent the beginning of July in Colorado with Noah, his grandma, his mom and her boyfriend. Then I was back in Harlem for 5 days before going to Germany for my grandma’s 70th birthday!!

While I was in Germany, we went to my grandparents’ home village with our grandma and our aunt. We stayed in a very cute inn that I suspected of having no internet because it was in Windheim. However, they had two computers in the dining area, so during our family dinner with all the relatives from the area, I snuck off to send Noah an email. When I finally got through all the popup warnings about browser updates, I saw that he had sent me something: A forward of his letter of acceptance as a transfer to City College!

So now my boyfriend is moving in. I called my building’s management company to ask for an extra key to the front door ($30) and he is bringing most of his stuff up this weekend. I’m really excited and now we can resume our summer plans. I still want to go do things and blog about them, the motivation just died down a bit when I realized that this summer is not one long good-bye. He’s still keeping his options open at his old university for next year, but for now we’ll brave the challenges of living together!

I’m very excited 🙂 Also, I’m studying for the GRE, which I’m taking on the 20th, and I’m trying to find a few new hobbies. German language club on meetup? Cooking more? Who knows. Any suggestions? I just feel like my life will change monumentally when I graduate, and I need something new and fun to at least establish some stability in my free time ^.^

Love,

Julia

Hey all,

Does anyone else here set impossibly high standards for him or herself? Who am I kidding, this is a Macaulay blog… to a certain extent, we’re all lovably yet certifiably insane. Here’s my issue: I’ve been noticing my perfectionism bleed over into how I see the world and other people.

Example: I’ve been waiting to find out if I am one of the lucky recipients of a fellowship, and one of the people that make the decision told me that I would know either by Thursday night or by Friday morning… LAST Thursday night or Friday morning. I didn’t hear anything. I asked around and this does not mean that I’ve been rejected–they simply didn’t let us know.

I became very annoyed about this and started to b•tch about how rude it is to set a deadline you know you can’t keep. I do this all the time but I don’t make it a habit to tell others I will do something important for them by a specific date unless I know I can do it.

When one of my roomies reminded me that people are just people, I said that I might be holding others to the impossible standards I have for myself. She disagreed because I am incredibly lenient with others… a step above doormat, actually. Apparently I hold SYSTEMS to a higher standard, and that’s not so great because systems are just made up of people, too. Right?

WRONG. Yes, people are just people and I should forgive them for their absentmindedness and whatnot, but I must retain my naive expectation that systems are close to perfect. At the very least, they ought to try.

In my fourth Macaulay seminar, we’ve recently talked about Bloomberg’s failure in dealing with homelessness. My paper for my internship class is about the fractured and poorly researched effort to improve English as a Second Language classes across the board in the United States. The crappy yet sometimes enlightening social theory class I’m taking is all about postcolonialist thought on how Western governments are making the same old mistakes in new and technologically improved ways. Every time I go to my internship or to work, I wonder about all the things that could be done to increase the number of clients we are serving. A lot of people need the services we offer but don’t realize that we can help them. Systems are imperfect but they should be better than they are now.

I know that I sometimes come across as holier-than-thou when I talk about the treatment of animals or how my life plan is to save the world and earn no money, but this is something I’m right about. Individuals are allowed to make mistakes but systems that do not function correctly must be reworked until they do. A good system can take some healthy human error and still function. I guess what I’m saying is that I don’t really care when I hear about my fellowship acceptance/rejection. The error made by the person I emailed simply reminded me of everything else that’s wrong.

Maybe my nearly communist social theory professor is rubbing off on me… I’m just sad about the illusion of order created by bureaucracy. Sure, there are systems in place everywhere, but do they do anything useful or must they simply convince us that they are trying?

Think on it,

Julia

Hey all,

So, starting this week, I guess I’ll write a blog every week. Teehee. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.

This week I’d like to talk about the seniors. I’ve been so wrapped up in planning my schedule for the summer and fall that it didn’t really sink in until yesterday that the seniors have FIVE WEEKS LEFT. That’s incredible and scary because it’s so close but they all have final projects to finish up.

Where are they going to go? What are they going to do? If they don’t have it figured out that can be a bummer if only because EVERYONE is asking them about it. It’s high school graduation all over again. “So what decisions have you made about the rest of your life today?”

This, my dear, fellow Juniors (and you underclassmen, too), is what we have to look forward to. It’s the good and the bad, the graduating and the real life. We’re adults already, but some of us are going to start our careers right after getting a bachelor’s. Some of us are going on for many more years of study, especially if we plan to stay in academia professionally. The question here is: Can we ever be ready?

I think college can do a fine job of preparing you to be prepared for life, but it doesn’t actually do much of the preparing for life. It’s a bit of a shield, a comfy baby blankey. Many of us are very ready to tackle the world on our own and to show that we have evolved past this structured learning environment. There is a time for everything, but leaving your undergrad alma mater can seem like a step toward freedom. Good times were had by all, and now it’s time to have them somewhere else. I hope you enjoy it.

Those you leave behind here are going to miss you, but we’ll follow in your footsteps soon enough. Now get a haircut and get a real job 😉

Love,

Julia

P.S. Here’s a funny video:

Hi all,

Apparently I am only able to blog once a month when I am in love. Who knew? 😀 Although I am still spending as much time as possible with my boy, and school is picking up again until finals in mid-May, I challenge myself to blog once a week until my birthday (May 16th). This is a great way to keep up with my life and to give the people I don’t see enough a quick glimpse into my thoughts.

SO, you are stressed after spring break, you say? You have less than two months to get yourself on track and ready for finals, you say? Yeah, nobody did enough over spring break and everyone’s freaking out. SO here are some great options (from discovery health and webmd) that you probably already know about but are ignoring because your stress spiral is already in full swing.

Kissing, hugging, and touching are very effective stress relievers! Give out some free hugs to your pals! Cuddle your family and pets if they’re okay with it! Those of you with significant others: Try to plan at least one more day a week with your partner instead of banishing them so you can get work done. It’s better for your relationship and for your stress levels if you have some physical contact 😉

Exercise. I know you may not want to. It’s hard to drag your tired body to the gym when all you want is a nap, but if you didn’t pull an all-nighter and you know that you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself, even a few short minutes of dancing to a favorite playlist in your room can perk you up. If you’re a college student, chances are you basically have a free gym membership at your school. Take advantage of it! Go to ZUMBA or boxing class until you’re back to happy. Push through! We only have a few weeks until summer.

Gardening, maybe?

Remember your hobbies. Sometimes it may feel like you have so much work that you can’t do anything other than worry about school and procrastinate all day before actually doing anything. Instead of sitting there staring at the screen, taking side trips to facebook, or pretending to read that book, do something you love! I should be doing at least three things right now, but what am I doing? Exactly. Blogging. Because it makes me feel good. 

Having a good cry can be soooooooo rewarding. I know, you’re all probably feeling ashamed just for thinking about it because society has taught you that it’s a sign of weakness, especially if you’re male. To that I say, “SO WHAT?” Maaaaybe our bodies know what they’re doing when crying comes forth as a natural reaction to a situation. Feel awkward about it? Then don’t do it in the library or while you’re giving a presentation. It’s a private thing you can do all by yourself in your room. It doesn’t work for everyone. All I’m saying is that you should just try not to suppress your tears when you feel that pressure behind your eyes. Let them out and a bunch of your stress will likely follow them.

AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Swear a bunch or scream it out if crying makes you feel too silly. Swearing will make you feel so much better. There’s just something about those four-letter words that makes you feel in control. They’re perfect if you want to tell your friends about that sh***y assignment that you have to f**ing finish by f**ing Wednesday. OR you could just go somewhere where you can primal scream your way to sanity. Maybe combine them. Go swear at the top of your lungs in a hopefully child-free area. This will be easier if you’re not in the city, but it’s fun. Maybe it will even get you to laugh….

Laugh it off/Spend time with people. Can’t laugh? Fake it until you can’t help doing the real thing. Go see your funniest friend or look up a really stupid movie on netflix. College humor or reddit r/funny it until you get a good chuckle going. It works! Take a break and stop looking so serious all the time. Your friends are probably stressed, too, and the best way to laugh it off is to socialize.

Count your blessings. This is the last one I’ll give you because it is really important and it should be done before or after you’ve completed one of the other stress-relieving tasks. Or all the time, anyway, just to remind yourself how great life is. Think about the things you love, the people you love and the people who love you. Consider what a privilege it is to be able to read this blog because you have internet… what a privilege it is to be able to see at all. Yeah, like any of these other ideas it can make you feel silly to have a go at this one, but wouldn’t you rather be silly than depressed?

Wishing you a stress-free everything.

Love,

Julia

Here’s the thing…. overachievers are overachievers even when they don’t act like it. All college students feel stress, but overachievers stress about the stupidest things (take it from someone who is doing so at this very moment).

Hugo Chavez died, and I am worried that I didn’t know enough about him because my major is International Studies and my focus is supposedly Latin America (which has more than one country…). Sure, I’m taking my first Latin American culture class this semester, but I should already know everything there is to know because INTERNET and OTHERWISE I’M NOT SMART. *sigh* Do you see?

While midterms seem like a minor speed bump before the beautiful week-ish of spring break, their existence is quite nerve-wracking. Group projects and research papers and exams always happen at the same time, and I am already freaking out about finals because I know how early I’ll have to start my final projects. How in the world do people handle this when they are behind on their time? I’m already going nuts trying to organize research for Spanish class at the Dominican Studies Institute for the presentation I’m doing the first full week after spring break. I have a presentation this Thursday and a midterm next Thursday. Readings and homework are due in between, but let’s not get finicky.

The one thing that’s freaking me out the most is my application for the Colin Powell Center’s Partners for Change Fellowship. It’s due next Tuesday and I am having my first and only (15 minute) meeting with the person that assists honors students with their applications. That might not be so helpful.

I have great recommenders that love me, though, and that makes me really happy. They support me and appreciate me as a person, which is more important than getting a fellowship. It’s wonderful to encounter people that can truly help you with your academic and personal development. My two recommenders just happen to lessen my stress because they are great writers and the things they will be writing about are all good.

I guess there are no pictures or anything in this blog, but I’m just glad I wrote my stress out a bit before I had spent a month without blogging. Like Tuesday/Thursday Zumba, I miss it and I need it back. And I’m going to get it back. As soon as I get the fellowship and ace all my classes (not including A-‘s here. Already had one of those. Didn’t like it).

Meditation is really useful for stress, you guys. Just go be quiet somewhere for a minute!

Looove,

Julia

Hey all,

Haha Holiday Romance novels. Don’t worry, my guy is definitely cuter than this creepy-looking joker.

Apparently Alena won the boyfriend bet. Hey, I’m as surprised as you are. I really didn’t think I’d find someone I liked and wouldn’t freak out about or run away from… at least anytime soon. But today we’ve been official for a month, and I am so still feeling it. Seriously.

How did this all happen? Not gonna kiss and tell. The point is that I’ve been living the dream all of January by lazily hopping back and forth between the city/my boyfriend and upstate/the family. Now classes have started, my internship has gotten off to a rocky yet inspiring start, and work is beginning next week. I have to be at school at 8:30 tomorrow to help out with the Kofi Annan talk, and I haven’t finished my first homework assignment for the Macaulay seminar 4 class I have tomorrow. Also, snow storm heading this way…..

So I thought, PERFECT TIME TO BLOG. If I wait until tomorrow, it’ll have been a month since my last entry, and that, ladies and gentlemen, ain’t right.

I am (as the title affirms) still off my rocker, so don’t even worry about losing my rambles because I am still all for explaining random things and convincing people to be happy.

Speaking of which:

Cutest thing ever.

Look at it, it will make you smile. Anywho, I’d like to compare my blossoming romance to something else that’s been going on: ALL OF MY CLASSES RELATE TO EACH OTHER. Junior year is academically epic. Everything I’m doing has to do with theories on morality, how to make the world better, and how to better our understanding of the world. I have so much reading to do but I love it. This feels like junior year of high school all over again because I am in control of what I am learning, and everything I am learning is fun and awesome despite the fact that it is difficult.

How do people survive 400-level classes without loving their majors? I don’t understand. I guess they’re saving all of their happiness time for after graduation, when they’ll be making money doing something that helps them make money… which buys happiness.

I don’t know, I’m not judging. I was just talking to my boss (founder and CEO of the NGO at which I volunteer) about how fulfilling it is to do work that you love. She is going pro-bono right now (which, yes, is likely sponsored by her retired banker husband who hated his job). Why? The organization doesn’t have enough money. So what did she do? Give up? NO! She is going to work every single day because she knows that there is a whole community of immigrants out there that depends on her. This is why I exist…. to live like her…to be like my mom who gave up accounting to work with dogs. Doing what you love for enough money is better than doing what you are kind of okay with for a lot of money. At least in my opinion. At least in the long run.

So let me tie this back together: enjoying life does not always mean doing the things that make sense. Maybe dating a guy that is going to a different place for school in the fall doesn’t make sense. Maybe thinking of maybe falling for him when I’m maybe leaving New York for good as soon as I graduate is maybe insane. But we established that I am that 😀 People can save the world and make lasting emotional connections.

Carpe ALL the diem

Love,

Julia