A Change of Pace Richard Tang's Immigrant Narrative

“My household was always kind of different. We spoke 3 languages between Cantonese, Vietnamese, and English, but I didn’t think anything of it.”

The first time Richard was really interested in learning about his parents’ immigration stories was elementary school, when teachers asked their students to talk about their parents’ careers. “We had to introduce where we were from and what are parents did, and I wasn’t entirely sure.”

He went home and quizzed his mother for answers to piece together his family’s history. His biological grandmother had too many children, so his mother Ai Ling Huang was adopted by his “grandma,” Huo Lan. Together, they lived in Guangzhou, China. However, they were unsatisfied with their lives. The rural region wasn’t fulfilling, and they yearned for a change of pace. Huo Lan’s husband had moved to New York chasing the connections he had in America, and they both agreed it was in their best interest to follow him there. They finally emigrated to be with him in the 1980s.

New York wasn’t exactly what they imagined it would be. Once they arrived in Chinatown, they found it hard to keep up with the fast pace of the city. It was a drastic change from the countryside they were used to. Huo Lan didn’t adjust as well to American life as her daughter did. She moved to support her husband and daughter, but it was difficult for her to learn English and adjust to an entire new culture at her age. At her mother’s encouragement, Ai Ling enrolled in high school, but she dropped out during her junior year because she needed to work longer hours at her job. She worked in a toy factory in Chinatown in order to support herself and Huo Lan.

Richard’s father Vinh Phat came to Chinatown during this same time, for similar reasons. He heard New York was the place to be if you wanted to have a successful career. His life home in Vietnam left him feeling unfulfilled, and the rumors of New York seemed worth pursuing. He came to New York with his two brothers in the 90s, moving in with his uncle in Chinatown.

Ai Ling and Vinh

Vinh was working as a restaurant delivery man when he first saw Ai Ling working in the toy factory. He tried for months to get her attention, but eventually he realized she wasn’t responding because her English skills were even worse than his own. They had to work hard to communicate their feelings for each other, but they realized they had more in common than they thought. Four years later they were married, working hard together to make sure their dreams for success in New York would come true.

Their means of survival weren’t always necessarily perfect. They opened a store together selling knockoff designer purses in Chinatown, and kept the business for five years before selling it to someone else, who was caught and sued. They moved into a small neighborhood in Brooklyn to start a family, but realized it wasn’t what they had dreamed of. They were robbed once, and felt unsafe traveling home without a knife. The American Dream wasn’t always clear cut. There were points where Vinh and Ai Ling questioned their decision. They knew they needed to work harder to find what was right for their family.

Ai Ling quit her job to be a housewife and take care of Richard and his older sister Belinda. Vinh switched from job to job, working as a mailman, a trucker in the meat business, and as a storage information logician for the same meat business. He finally found a steady job in the auto industry, through a connection through friends he met in Chinatown.

Discussing his parents’  work

They moved to Fresh Meadows in Queens, and they finally feel content with their lives. Richard describes his new house as the “most perfect suburban home.” There is “no other place [he] would rather be,” and he’s proud of his parents for succeeding in finding a good life for themselves and their family.

“This is what they wanted and they reached that point.”

Belinda, Vinh, Ai Ling, and Richard

Richard learned his parents’ philosophies as he grew older, and recognized how their immigration stories influenced their ways of thinking. They measured their love through their achievements of success for their family. His father always knew that personal success would help their family succeed as a whole. “If you truly care for people, you have to provide for them.” He was constantly busy with work, and didn’t get to spend as much time with his kids as he would have liked. His mother’s philosophy on life was that you need toput your family first if you want them to succeed. Remembering her own mother’s sacrifice of moving to America so her daughter could have a better life, Richard’s mom reasoned that everyone would have to put their family’s wishes ahead of their own at some point. His sister Belinda falls in line with her mother’s philosophy that you have to look out for those you love before you help yourself. When I asked Richard, he said “I kind of fall in the line of my dad.”

“We work hard to improve ourselves in order to improve the family.”

His dad shows love by providing for others. His mother makes sure everyone else is content before she considers herself. “I don’t necessarily agree with that. I think you do have to look out for yourself before you help other people.”

Richard learned his parents’ immigration stories, but didn’t fully understand their experiences until he was a few years older. In middle school, he did his friend a favor by holding his backpack for him, and his mother saw and was outraged. He was embarrassed at her anger, not realizing what he had done to make her so emotional. She explained that she had worked very hard, and didn’t want it to go to waste by having people walk all over her son. “My mom taught me not to be a pushover. She thought I was too nice for the world. She spent her whole life searching for another life, and wanted me to start out knowing what I was worth.”

Richard discussing how his parents’ immigrant experiences have influenced his life

Richard doesn’t take his parents’ experiences for granted. He’s grateful for what they taught him, and proud of their accomplishments.

Written by Christina Ramos