The society of Italian Harlem was a matriarchy—both in the domus and in the wider, more explicit religion of the people. Though the father was traditionally established as the head of the domus, his domain of the family was merely superficial. It was the mother who truly held the power. Orsi emphasizes that in many ways the Italian mother was someone to be feared by her relatives. Undoubtedly, it was the mother who lay down the law; though she required the help of her husband or oldest son for enforcement, she almost always had the final word on a matter. Sons or daughters wishing to marry would have to first introduce his or her beloved to the mother for approval. From there, it was up to the mother to decide if the marriage would occur or not.

At the same time, Orsi writes about the struggle that women faced in the domus. Paradoxically, he speaks of the powerlessness that accompanied their great influence in the family. One of the main focuses of the chapter is the entrapment and lack of space that many unmarried Italian women felt. They were very closely supervised by the males of the family and were rarely, if ever, allowed to leave the home on their own. Orsi portrays a sense of suffocation and greatly emphasizes the limits this placed on the women. I do believe, however, that he was overlooking many factors. For one, it seemed to be this way only because of the deep contrast between the values of the traditional Italian family and the emerging American culture. The more boundless and frivolous the American way of life became, the more it became a necessity for the Italian family to tighten its grip on new generations. The American way of life was indeed a large threat to the establishment of the domus, which, undeniably, contained within it certain elements of happiness for the Italians and other peoples—this included the longevity of marriage, family intimacy and solidarity, and simple living. Back in Italy, it is quite possible that the women did not feel constrained at all, because the intense juxtaposition of culture would not have been present.

I found it interesting how Orsi expanded the discussion to include the spiritual worship of the Italian immigrants. In this dominating Catholic tradition, the people of Italian Harlem worshipped the Virgin Mary, praying to her in their times of need and thanking her in their fevers of gratitude. They honored the statue of the Virgin on 115th Street, which was a physical reminder of the Virgin’s feminine characteristics. By being faithful to such an honorable and spiritual mamma, many immigrants alleviated the sense of guilt they felt for leaving their Italian mothers back at home. The Virgin was the focal point of the moral code and value system of Italian culture, just like the mother was the bond that held family members together in the domus.