I remember when I first listened to the soundtrack for A Star Is Born, I instantly fell deeply in love with it. I started watching trailers, interviews, and any footage I could possibly find on YouTube because I was so captivated by the music. It was almost as if I could already picture the entirety of the movie in my head before it even hit theaters. The love story between Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper seemed so effortless, so elegant. It made me feel bittersweet, my heart aching for them just a little in the good kind of way.

When it finally came to the big screen, I texted all of my friends, hoping one of them would be willing to go see it with me. When one of them did, I was so excited, and I dragged them to the nearest theater, sitting impatiently in my seat and waiting for the film to begin. I couldn’t help but smile every time a song I loved started playing, and I followed along in my head, comparing the scene to what I had imagined in my head.

Bradley Cooper directed the film with the intention of keeping it as authentic and realistic as possible, setting a small budget and often times using real staff members as actors. In addition, most of the concerts in the movie were real-life concerts where they would invite actual audience members to watch them perform. I loved the sentiment behind this, because I’m a sucker for pure and authentic content and in that aspect, Cooper delivered. However, there were a few flaws with the movie that really disappointed me. I felt like, although certain moments were very beautifully orchestrated and theatrical, there wasn’t enough of a buildup in the relationship between Bradley and Lady Gaga. It was like they met, fell in love immediately, and then everything started falling apart before I got attached. And when he eventually took his own life, the scene flashed to Lady Gaga singing, and it was very unclear what had happened until after when the news broke. They didn’t have to make it very graphic, but they could’ve incorporated more elements into the scene to make the events a little more vivid, so it would be more emotional for the viewer.

As the credits began rolling on the screen, I was left with mixed feelings of discontent and appreciation for the film. I loved so many parts of it, but my mistake was falling in love with the idea of it before I saw the actual movie. But, at the same time, that’s also what I loved about it. It’s raw and not heavily edited and it attempts to mimic real human emotion and relationships. It reminds me that, a lot of times, I will become attached to a concept, an intangible perception of something or someone that isn’t real, but it doesn’t necessarily mean what really is can’t be amazing. Life may disappoint during the moments that we anticipate the most, and you may put it on a pedestal, romanticize it, embellish it, but, in the very end, it won’t meet your expectations. But, that’s okay. Life is flawed, just like A Star Is Born, but I’ve learned to love it regardless