Art in The Everyday:
Wall of Messages
When I first came to college, I was expecting excitement and adventure. Those I got, but there was also an overwhelming sense of loss, confusion, and displacement. These feelings reached a peak late one night when I randomly ran out of the dorms and into a Duane Reade. Wandering up and down the aisles with nothing but a few bucks in my pocket and nobody in the store but the cashier, I languished in the suffocating atmosphere until colorful, bright squares caught my eye – post-it notes. Before I knew it, I had brought them and was heading back.
In my dorm room, I chided myself for wasting money buying a useless thing. Weren’t money problems were bad enough already; what was I even thinking; why couldn’t I be more responsible? But without thinking, I took out a sky blue post-it, scribbled something, and slapped it on the wall above my bed. “You’re better than this, so give it your best! Make me proud!” What did that even mean? I didn’t know at the time, but over the months, whenever a strong emotion struck me, I would write something down and put it up on the wall. The collection of messages has been growing ever since.
Recently, I realized that this wall of messages was a coping mechanism much like the message board used by the family members of 9/11 victims. They had kept putting up missing person notices long after hope had died, not because they thought their loved ones would return, but as a way to express their grief and send a message telling their story. Somewhere along the way, this creative expression became art.
This visual art on my wall became a symbol of human spirit to me. Most of the messages are inspirational and say things like “You deserve to be HAPPY!” and help keep my spirits up. I use whatever color pops into my mind first, and affix the notes spreading outward from the first one. I can’t pinpoint the exact date of each post, but I’m hoping that as I grow, the style of my messages changes to reflect my growth. By the end of the school year, the entire wall will probably be covered, so I’ll start on the next wall. Hopefully, I don’t run out of post-its!