The Monster Fades
The theme of the monster, that John pointed out in our last class, continues to resurface throughout Books 3 and 4 of Middlesex. What is interesting to note is that the point when Cal finally accepts him/herself as a unique being, not a monster, is when his/her body is displayed in a freak show of sorts. One would think that this zoo-like showcase of Cal’s genitals at the Sixty-Niners club would reinforce the feeling of being something “other” and monster-like. The opposite happens, as Cal describes on page 494:
“I opened my eyes underwater. I saw the faces looking back at me and I saw that they were not appalled. I had fun in the tank that night. It was all beneficial in some way. It was therapeutic. Inside Hermaphroditus old tensions were roiling, trying to work themselves out. Traumas of the locker rooms were being released. Shame over having a body unlike other bodies was passing away. The monster feeling was fading.” The very thing that Cal feared – looking into the eyes of customers – was the thing that helped Cal to accept his/her identity. And, in a roundabout way, the job at the Sixty-Niners was what eventually set Cal on a path back home, back into the road to acceptance within his family.
