Like many women, I face street harassment on a daily basis. This video is not meant to dismiss the prevalence of street harassment, or discourage women from holla’ing back. Rather, I meant to highlight the state of almost-constant fear and anxiety that women live in because street harassment is an accepted part of our culture. Whether we’re walking down the street to Starbucks in the middle of the day, or walking home alone late at night, every man, or group of men, becomes a possible perpetrator of street harassment. We try to avoid making eye contact, look inconspicuous, walk a little faster. In many, perhaps most cases, our assumptions are correct, and our efforts are futile. We are met with stock phrases like “hey baby” “can I get your number” “nice ass” “look at those tits” – there seems to be no limit to the phrases that can shock, insult, and degrade women in a matter of seconds.
But occasionally, our assumptions are wrong. Walking home alone from the gym late last week, I saw a man wearing a hoodie leaning against the side of a building. I immediately felt the tightness in my stomach that comes with fear and anxiety; without thinking I looked down and speed up my pace. I walked past the man waiting for a comment that never came. I suddenly felt ashamed of myself. Who was I to make an assumption about this man’s character and intentions, simply based on his gender and clothing? Isn’t that exactly what feminists are fighting against? Later reflection on the pervasiveness of street harassment helped me to shift the blame and shame.
This is my appeal to the MEN of New York City. Help us to stop street harassment. DEFY the negative expectations women are forced to have about you. Re-condition us so that we don’t have to be afraid simply walking the streets. And if a woman hollabacks, listen.
Visit hollaback! to learn more and get involved.
This was such a great video. It was short, to the point and honest. Loved it!!!
I love your confrontational response! It’s just sad that in real life – in my experience – when I holla’d back, the harassment often escalated; it went from “Hey mami, SMILE,” to, “Well, you’re ugly anyway!” It’s really sad (and irritating) when you feel you can’t win when it comes to street harassment.
Well done on the video!
Yes! That frustration is something I was definitely trying to capture.
This video was great here is a status my friend posted of a similar nature i asked if i can repost first of course, but the idea behind the post is similar:
a. How To Escape Potential (If they have potential..they’re probably creepers) Creepers
1. When you are innocently studying on the bus, and a youngish guy asks you if you’re taking anatomy, immediately be suspicious (So what if your paper is clearly marked, “Anatomy”? Why does he want to know? He had to lean pretty far to be able to see that.) Silently vow to never take bus again.
2. Notice his looks (are his eyes a little TOO bright? Creepy-looking nose and scary-ish face? DOES HE LOOK LIKE ANY BAD GUY FROM TAKEN?! *the last one is a major indicator)
3. Don’t assume that he is a classmate from your large anatomy class that just ended and tell him “Yes, I do go to Hunter!” (cuz that would be silly)
4. When he seems a little too happy to find out any details about you (OH! You go to Hunter? You take the bus from Hunter every day? So you must live in the city!), internally curse yourself for being approachable and turn the conversation around (but of course, Strange Creeper Man will say he isn’t from the city…evil, I tell you)
5. Create a clever cover story (No, I don’t live here, I’m visiting a friend. Look down and give a gentle but firm smile/nod that indicates the conversation is over.)
6. At the next stop pretend to get off while going to the back of the bus and blend in with cute Asian family. Notice every quiet person on the bus…they might be looking around a little TOO much…they could be his allies.
Curse self internally for wearing bright yellow and blue colors.
7. Be clever and don’t get off at your stop, but trick the creeper man (who is OBVIOUSLY gonna try to follow you and execute some Taken-esque move where he and his accented buddies surround you and your iPhone is dead AND LIAM NEESON WON’T BE THERE BC HE ISN’T YOUR DAD!!!)
(But get off at your stop if you were gonna make hot dogs and you really wanted ketchup from the grocery store on 23rd street.)
8. While hurrying (casually, of course…just briskly going your way) down the street, wish with all your heart that you WERE liam neeson’s daughter and/or were equipped with skills to escape bad guys.
9. After looking behind your shoulder for several blocks, once you reach your dorm, smile happily at the security guards who usually annoy you and celebrate your escape with aforementioned hot dogs
Sorry for the very very long comment
Demelio
Thanks! The self-blame that women go through when we experience street harassment, and the ways WE change OUR behaviors–even though they aren’t the inappropriate ones–is really frustrating (“silently vow to never take bus again” “curse yourself for being approachable” “curse self internally for wearing bright colors” “hurrying down the street”). But I’m guilty of them as well!