For my Caretaker Study, the first person I thought to portray was my mother. She loves and cares about me and my siblings, it is evident from her poses. In my realistic pose, I am showing my mom in a specific situation. Her face is questioning me, wondering why my siblings and I made a silly error. The moment that I associate with this face just shows how strong her expressions are. The night of the accepted students reception for Macaulay, my parents were away. I carefully planned how to get to the reception from school, but when it came to getting back, I was nervous about traveling so late. I wanted to get home as fast as possible, and took the express train instead of the local. At the end of the line (which was closing for the night), instead of my neighborhood of Riverdale, I was in Harlem, and had no clue how to get home. Luckily, my siblings used the internet to find me a bus ride home, but when I told my mom about the night, she was shocked. Of course, she felt terrible for being away while I was in distress, but I could feel her giving me this stare as she asked me why I didn’t just call someone to pick me up. I knew she was giving me this look, because just from this face I know there was an obvious choice that I did not see. Somehow, this face makes me aware of the obvious choice — only it is usually after the fact.

My abstract pose is also of my mother. Despite everyone’s best guesswork, this pose was meant to reflect my mother’s caring nature. She works as a social worker with children below the age of three, so of course she loves babies. This pose, the fetal position, is meant to show this love of children and her care for family. She puts so much energy into creating a close family and raising me and my siblings well, which continues to amaze me. It is quite the challenge, bringing up two sets of twins that are only two and a half years apart. But somehow, she and my father have done a great job. Her caring and natural motherly nature has shaped the four of us in innumerable ways.

Meira Harris

For the subject of both my realistic and abstract caretaker studies, I chose my sister, Mary. As the eldest of three children, she has frequently been given responsibility of my other sister and I. In my upbringing, she has taken the role of the mature big sister. She is the one who offers criticism and counsel at every turn in my life.

For the realistic pose of my sister, I sought to portray the expression she gives me when I do something wrong. When I disappoint her, she will put her hands on her hips, tilt her head, and raise her eyebrow , as if to say, “Really, Alvin?” She gives me this expression almost on a daily basis, so I believe to put it in her realistic pose would embody her perfectly. The class was pretty much spot on in guessing the pose was of a female scolding a child.

The abstract pose was also of my sister, but it represented another side of her. In the pose, I tilted my feet slightly inward, clasped my hands together with a finger over my mouth, and tilted my head downward. This pose was meant to be an abstraction of my sister’s sometimes shy and sheepish nature. Although she is very comfortable around me because we grew up in the same house, she tends to be somewhat timid around others. She will not say whats really on her mind around strangers. Rather, she’ll reserve those emotions for the family and close friends.

For my caretaker study, I decided to emulate my dad both realistically and abstractly. My dad’s a funny person who loves to talk. Whenever he meets someone new, he tends to talk nonstop. He loves being social. All of my friends who have met him think that he’s the funniest/coolest dad out there, but I personally think he’s weird [in a good way]. He can be annoyingly suffocating, strict, and overbearing, but I think that overall, I’m a pretty lucky guy to have him as a dad.

For my realistic pose, I decided to do a pose that he does when he’s just sitting and listening to music or when he’s sitting anywhere and just people watches. When he does this, he just sits and looks ahead with one leg atop the other. He has a slight smile every time I see him do this pose; I don’t know why.

For my abstract pose, I decided to highlight his indecisiveness. To do so, I took off part of my sweatshirt and one of shoes, and I tried to look confused. My dad always needs confirmation on a place to eat or on something to do before actually doing it. For example, if we want to eat out for dinner and he’s in the driver’s seat, he’ll keep asking what we want to eat (and we’ll tell him), but he ends up choosing some other place. He doesn’t know what he wants most of the time. This doesn’t mean he can’t make up a decision, though. He works as a Senior Vice President at Citigroup, so he has to make decisions; but as a regular dad, he’s pretty indecisive.

I chose to use my dad as the subject of my caretaker studies for several reasons. My father has always been a very prominent figure in my life. Although he was very strict when I was younger, a lot of my personality and interests take after his. My dad is sometimes blunt and unreasonable, but he has never ceased to support me in all that I do.

I chose the first pose to be my dad’s realistic pose because it was something he used to do after he broke his collar bone earlier in the year. He would sit on the couch relaxed and watching TV, but his right hand would be massaging his collar bone, and even after it had already healed, he kept touching it out of habit. Although he doesn’t do it as often, there are still times that I find my dad in this same pose, hence I chose it to represent him in this study. I think this pose represents my dad’s calmer, more relaxed side. He is very opinionated and unafraid to speak his mind, but he also knows how to wind down and hold back when he knows it’s not the right time to speak out.

The second, abstract pose represents my dad’s strictness. For a long time, up until about my junior year of high school, my dad kept a very short leash on my social life. And during that time of my life, there were many times I felt very suffocated. I wanted to speak my mind and reason that he was not being fair, but could never find the courage to do so until I reached the third year of high school. This no longer really applies now that I am in college, but the way my father raised me has had a very large, if not the largest impact on who I am today.

The first pose, contrary to what most people thought, was of my mother. She would always wake me up early in the morning, screaming into a phone with anger and annoyance. To be honest, the only reason why I’m able to wake up in the mornings on the weekends is because of my mother screaming into the phone. She’s a very busy person – sometimes I hardly see her in the mornings, afternoons, and nights. She runs errands for my father, and then she has to take care of problems of numerous condos and apartments. In short, my mother is a landlady. My father on the other hand, is an architect. So while my father creates these buildings, my mother rents them out. Since my father is overseas most of the time, my mother has to deal with the tenants. She has to deal with them almost everyday, and most of the time it is through the phone. My raised hand signals her angry hand gestures, as if saying “what is the problem?” or “what do you mean?” or “I have done everything you asked for already, why are you still unsatisfied?”. My opened mouth signifies the way my mother screams into the phone occasionally, and the way my leg is propped up shows her old habits of propping up her leg. Her phone rings at least five times a day – even when she was on vacation, leaving her cell phone with my sister, it rang nonstop. My sister had to be a substitute for my mother, and I could almost see my mother in my sister as she also talks into the phone and makes the odd hand gestures.

My second pose though, is of my sister. The comments people had were correct – my raised hand and tilted head signifies asking for help. However, the pose meant more of giving help than receiving. Curled fingers are more natural than a flat hand, so giving help was more natural to my sister than receiving. My stretched hand represented how she would always be there to help me, or anyone even, whenever they needed help. She grew up with having to take care of two younger sisters, and knew of her responsibilities as the oldest child. She always tried to do the right thing and was very proper, which is the reason why I stood up straight with my feet planted firmly on the ground, side by side. Even though she knew she had a lot of responsibilities she asked for help whenever she needed it. She didn’t try to take on the world without wanting anyone else to help her, and she knew her limits. Although we don’t see each other as much as we did when I was younger, I know that she’ll always be there to help me, and that I’ll always be there to help her now.

Both my realistic and abstract poses represented the same person in my life. My dad. He’s actually my step-father, but he’s the only father I’ve known since I was three years old, so I don’t think of him any differently than anyone else thinks of their dad. Sometimes I think I’m more like him than I am my mom.

The first pose with the hand in pocket and the other behind the head is one I see almost every day that I encounter when my dad becomes lost in his thoughts. He is a very reserved, thoughtful person and speaks slowly and in few words when he does choose to speak, giving each word he says more weight. My dad is a mathematician so his mind is constantly finding new problems to dissect, though rarely does he seem to consider minute “everyday problems.” He spends hours alone reading about semantics, computer language, and new ideas in quantum physics… things that only his mind can filter through like a machine, but with human thoughts. When he stands like this, to me he has a very wise and weathered look. His body is loose, his stance relaxed, but his hand scratching his head reminds us that there is a lot going on behind his non-revealing neutral gaze. When he is stressed, he contains a lot of his thoughts within his head. So it’s never quite clear if he is just contemplating life, puzzled by some new mathematical problem, or actually feeling tense or worried. When he scrunches up his face in a squint, you know that he is deep in thought, and most likely, he won’t tell you about it. To others, my dad may seem mysterious and distant, but when I encounter him poised like this, I might ask him what he’s thinking or bothering him, or maybe just leave him be.

The second pose with the slight squat and rounded arms is also meant to represent my dad. I was actually inspired by tai chi, because my dad has been practicing the martial art as a form of exercise and meditation for over 10 years. Tai chi emphasizes the flow of energy, or “chi”, throughout the body. The knees are always slightly bent and the arms convey a combination of fluid and sharp movements. The pose I performed was meant to show stability, calm, and self-contained energy. My feet were solidly planted with the weight equally dispersed from toe to toe, my knees bent, my core straight and strong with my weight centered. I tried to reach a state of perfect balance, for my dad’s presence feels this way–calm, certain, and secure. The reason I rounded my arms was not an embrace, as the class thought, but a shape meant to show fullness and continuity, and well as self-reliance. The arms center his being and show that his thoughts (as I said before) are kept in his own space. And though he is a solitary, self-reliant person, I wanted to create a rounded shape to represent this, to evoke the energy of tai chi, rather than an arms-crossed, closed-off stance. I think there is a large difference between solitary and being closed, and in this case my dad is the former. His company and his words bring me a sense of balance and composure — that is what I wanted to recreate.

I chose my dad as my caretaker for both of my poses.  He probably wouldn’t want me to tell everyone how old he is, so I’ll just tell you that he’s in his fifties.  My dad works in Staten Island as a Sergeant in New York State Supreme Courts, and he spends the rest of his time taking care of my mom, sister, brother, myself, and the rest of my family.  My dad is one of the most important people in my life, and he most definitely is one of my main caretakers.

My realistic pose was of me lying on the stage with my hands behind my head and my feet crossed.  I was trying to portray my father sleeping.  At home, we always see my dad sleeping a lot whether it be in his room, on the couch, at night, or in the middle of the day.  I wasn’t trying to say that he is lazy or carefree because he really is not.  He works hard at his job, runs errands, and does many things to help my family.  I’d like to think he’s just tired from all that he does so he likes to nap often.  Honesty, I probably get my crazy sleeping habits from him.  It was interesting to hear the different ideas about whom I was portraying.  Some classmates did think I was a man because of the way I placed my hands.  Still, many people were wrong in the age and gender of the person in my pose.

My abstract pose was of me standing in an almost “Superman” position with my head tilted upward and my hands on my hips.  I was trying to convey a “superhero” quality of my father.  Many people thought I was portraying a woman because of the way my hands were placed and my head was lifted; however, I was actually trying to show a sense of confidence and strength that my dad possesses.  Even when I was younger I always perceived my dad as very strong and protective.  Growing up, he has always supported me and made me feel safe.  Although I don’t see him everyday since I live in the dorms, I still know that he supports me and cares about me.  His continued encouragement in my life made transitioning into college life easier.  Even though he really didn’t want me to leave home, he supported my decision to dorm and to get a full college experience.  I chose my dad for this pose because I truly believe that our relationship has helped me to grow knowing that he’ll always be there when I need him.

My realistic pose was of my father. Every time we take a picture of my father, he makes this pose to mess with me and my sisters. He loves to scrunch up his nose and purse his upper lip to make us laugh. I crossed my arms and took a wider stance to show how he usually stands like a little child, stubborn and unwillingly to compromise. In order to get my father to stop, we usually have to complement him or tell him we will love him if he lets us take the picture.  He loves hearing us adore him. I chose my father for my caretaker studies because after a really hard day of school, watching television and laughing with him always cheers me up. He is a police officer and he has always been a person to help and entertain others. A big part of my interest in medicine, politics, and human rights comes from his dedication to public service and instilling that in me. When I was younger, my father was the one who made me breakfast in the morning and got me ready to go to school since my mother worked. Out of my sisters, I‘m the closest to my father since we have similar habits of talking, political ideologies, interest in sports, and overall personalities. I explained the Caretaker study to my sisters and did this pose and they knew instantly that I was mimicking him because it represents him to well: funny and warmhearted.

My abstract pose was of my older cousin.  She was an NYU student when I was young. In between her 4 jobs, studying, and her double majors, she would always bring me clothes and food home since my aunt used to babysit me. If she missed me a day, she would drop by our apartment to kiss me goodnight and drop off presents. Since I was so young when she went to college, everyone thought I was her daughter and till this day she calls me her “first daughter” (since she has a daughter of her own now). This pose represents two characteristics of my cousin: vocal/opinionated, and nurturing/caring. The calling out gesture represents my cousin’s free nature of saying what she means and meaning what she says. She studies and researches everything to become an expert on any interest she tries from interior decorating to running a small business. She is a risk taker and isn’t afraid to break tradition to pursue things she loves. She encourages me to pick up hobbies and interests and pursue them so that I chose a career I will love and have experiences I will enjoy. In the pose, my other hand is held out like I was holding a child. This part of the pose represents her nurturing and caring side that she has for me and has for her children.  She is charismatic, energetic, and cool person that children just gravitate towards. She was a big part of my upbringing and is still a huge part of my life.

For my first pose, I chose my father as my caretaker. He’s been one of the most influential people in my life, shaping me into the person I’ve become. He’s in his late sixties and is a teacher of high school English. Before that, he was an editor and travelled the world. For my realistic pose, I stood lecturing with a book in my hand. I see my father as a wise and cultured person and I chose to portray him in a confident and knowledgable pose. This is a pose he would often assume as a teacher, but it is also a pose I think represents the qualities he possesses such as knowledge, wisdom, and confidence. Many people quickly knew it was my father and that he’s a teacher. The hand was meant to represent my father’s quality of reaching out to others and share his knowledge as a teacher. The class was very spot-on in this pose.

For my abstract pose, I chose my mother as my caretaker. Although the pose wasn’t abstract in its physicality, I chose it to be abstract because it’s not a pose I would see a caretaker assume normally. It’s a mentally abstract pose in that it’s a pose a child or teenager would take, not a parent. My mother is normally a very communicative and social person. To me, this pose was an abstraction of the way she normally is and represents her her internal feelings about her difficult familial background. I see my mother as a very strong person, despite what she’s overcome in her childhood. However, there are times in my life when I’ve seen my mother falter in her strength. Everyone was correct in thinking this was a woman, however they all believed it was a child or teenager. Often, I think my mother feels like she’s still a child or a teenager and that’s she’s stuck in her parents’ divorce. This is a physical representation of the way she closes herself off and regresses into those feelings. Eloise was correct in stating that sucking my stomach and my arms, as well as the closed feet and downturned head were meant to represent a feeling of safety.  However, it was also meant to represent the way my mother closes herself off and holds in all these feelings. This person is not physically five, but is mentally regressing into the feelings of that age.