CUNY Macaulay Honors College at Baruch College/Professor Bernstein
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Secret Language

As a lowly white male living in the most diverse borough, in one of the most diverse cities, I have often felt isolated from my more culturally defined peers. I have never left the country, and when someone asks me what race I am there is an awkward pause, until finally I proclaim, with very little pride, “I am white.”

I’m supposed to be Catholic and I guess my ancestry means that I’m mostly Italian. The problem is that I haven’t been to church in at least five years and the closest thing to Italy I’ve seen is the inside of a pizzeria. I don’t want to pretend I’m something I’m not and I’m definitely no Roman Catholic Italian. Everyone seems to be so interesting and unique, culturally at least, what happened to me?

I guess I blame it on the fact that I can only speak one, not so exclusive, language. I always wanted to speak a sexy language, or maybe one of those cool languages. Walking around Baruch and seeing all the different groups speaking in their own languages makes me feel jealous, to me it seems like everyone is part of small, super secret clubs bonded by uniquely shared sounds. I want to join! It’s not all bad news though, I get to participate in a much larger club, making friends with people from various cultures and adjusting my own cultural identity along the way.