I have asked myself this question for more than five years. Five years ago, I definitely said New York City is my inferno. I don’t remember how many times I have cried at night before sleeping because I thought my life in here was a nightmare. When I was lying on my bed and thought about my hometown, my tears just began to drop involuntarily. Nostalgia was one cause, but there are reasons. Life is always full of changes, but I didn’t expect such large differences between the two places. Although I wasn’t rich in China, at least I had a more decent living condition than I did in New York City. I don’t know whether I am justified in having so much comparison between the two places, but that always happened when people have lived in more than one region. Perhaps people may wonder why I would even come to America if I had a decent life in my hometown. Again, this answer may not be justified, but that is my only answer—I didn’t have any control over this issue, just like I didn’t have control over who my parents are. I may be able choose where to go when I finish undergraduate school, at least for the past and present time, I had no choice.
Life is tougher for my parents. That was the reason my mother always said, “I come here because of you.” While I really sympathized with her, I never agreed on this matter. I know that my parents have given up a lot to come to America, but my life didn’t become any better either. She always says that my future will be better in America, but who knows what will happen in the future. Just look at today’s economy, and see how depressing it is.
What exactly are so bad about New York City? Just like other places, if people are poor, they can hardly survive. Being poor is not a sin, but people simply cannot live in poverty. This is true in any place. Therefore, I began to ask myself what the American dream really is. Is it only a representation of wealth and money? At least I don’t agree. There are too many stories about people who are well educated come to America and look for jobs that are incompetent with their educational levels. Are they satisfied with their lives? Some of them may yes, but most of them would say no. Money is not omnipotent. It cannot exchange for reputation. It cannot be the substitutes for the achievements people are pursuing. I finally figured out that the American dream is not special at all. It is just that people’s expectations are too high. It was true that America was very prosperous in the old days, and many people had changed their lives through hard work, but these days don’t exist anymore, at least not in 2011.
My opinion towards New York City becomes better after I went to college. College is a pleasant experience because I can experience the beauty of New York City. To be honest, I have never been to any performances in New York City before attending college. This was the reason I was so excited about every performance that I went with class. I cannot say I like every performance, but the experiences were very enjoyable. I can never forget how many people I have asked to get to the Cherry Lane Theater the first time I went to the Greenwich Village. I can never forget the glamour of the Metropolitan Opera House as well as the entire Lincoln Center. The arts in the city are really attractive to me. I also want to thank New York City because it teaches me a lot. It provides me with so many educational opportunities, so I can finish my high school and college educations without worries. It helps me to understand the importance of education after having so many nightmarish experiences. (Although it’s a digression, I still want to write this down. I finally understand why young people were fighting for colleges after the Cultural Revolution in China. It is a turning point of one’s life without any doubt.) I can now choose a field that I think can best change my life. Although it may not be the field that I like the most, it is the one that is the most beneficial to me. (It is sad to love something that you shouldn’t love.) I believe in my choice and myself.
New York City is a shining star on earth. Yet to me, it is just the same as the other cities, or maybe worse. People cannot experience its difficulty if they are not in it. New York City would never be my Eden, but it would not be my inferno either. After all, I have spent my most crucial time in this city. It is the most important place for my education. It shapes my future, and I cannot deny its influence on me.
