We’ve had the Wong image…
“It was the land of dreams; talks had it that there were mountains of gold, even the streets were lined with them.” Or so they said. People were flocking to the United States in droves, in pursuit of this dream. But what this country really offered; was not instant riches, but rather, opportunities. Many came, but success came only to those who worked hard to achieve it. “Yes, life was harsh at first, but compared to how it was back there, the hardships seemed trivial.”
“Trying times are what make a person… How they react, their composure, maybe they even respond with a smile.” Having lived through countless Japanese invasions in China, Cheung Sheng Wong was accustomed to antagonism and poor living conditions. Those were times of great turmoil and strife. Food was scarce – there would be lines of people waiting to receive meager weekly rations, for everything was allocated to the troops (and even they didn’t have enough food). Everyone was living in constant paranoia, they never knew if they would be the victims of the next Japanese assault. Women were raped, entire families were slaughtered, and the males were subjected to merciless types of torture and were utterly humiliated; when towns were sacked, the men were forced to observe as the events unfolded. Wong was a casualty of these atrocities; watching helplessly as his uncle’s legs were broken and various other vulgar acts were done unto other family members.
One does not live through trying times, and remain unscathed. The wounds inflicted by such painful memories can never fully heal. Instead, there are scars, which mark such chapters in a person’s life. However, in this case, the scars are not literal; they manifested themselves in the form of personal barriers, and a more reserved nature. Because these experiences forced him to mature in such a short period of time; Wong was bereft of many childhood experiences, and began the process of shielding himself from reality. “Holing up from the rest of the world was not the smartest thing I could’ve done, but it seemed like the best option, given the circumstances.”
There was no gentle process of healing, for Wong was a sailor. He was constantly away from home for months on end, given a only a few days leave after each expedition; which did not help to ease the trepidation of leaving the family alone to fend for themselves. As he clarified, “it wasn’t that I didn’t want to be there, I couldn’t… if I took the time, who would support the family, who would provide for the expenses?” At the tender age of 18, he became the pillar of support for the entire family. Moreover, he witnessed many of his fellow crewmates pass on during these ventures; the survivors guilt further piling onto his grief. “Many times I wonder if I did anything wrong, if they would still be here if I had done something different.” But sailing wasn’t all that bad; it had many good results. For one, it landed him in the United States.
“Land ho!” A most welcomed sound. It had been weeks at sea, and everyone was just about ready to cut their losses and head home. They all ran portside and stared in awe at the place called “Mei Gwo,” (Cantonese for America) literally translated as beautiful country. As the vessel docked, he caught a view of a totally different world. Everyone was properly dressed, the streets were paved, and most of all, there were no sounds of gunfire. At that point he had decided that this was where he was going to build a new home. He would start from scratch, and provide his children with a better life than they could ever have back in China.
The prospect of taking charge of his future was exhilarating, but yet horrifying at the same time. Yes, they would escape the bullets and batteries of the Japanese, but they would be leaving home. That was where they had lived their entire lives; that’s all they ever knew. Could he just leave behind the land of his ancestors? However, what would happen if they were to stay, and the Japanese came back, then life would be over anyways. Would they be successful in “the land of possibilities?” He would never know unless he tried; plus, he was practically handed a free ticket into America.
With that in mind, he began to advance towards the boarding ramp. The closer he got, the more anxious he felt. The tension was unbearable; what if they saw him? What would they do? Truth be told, several of his fellow shipmates had already jumped ship, and were scurrying off to begin their new lives. There he was, at that moment, at the very top of the ramp, staring at his bridge over troubled waters. Taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, he quickly began to descend; all the while praying to himself, “please don’t see me, please don’t see me.” He expected the world to stop and everyone to stare at him committing this crime – “I almost wanted them to stop me, so that I could just go back home and forget about all these trivial matters.” Before he knew it, he reached the bottom of the ramp, no one saw him, and no one even bothered to look at him while passing. He thought to himself, “imagine that, the only Chinese person around is barreling down the boarding ramp at full speed, with eyes closed and nobody notices! Well I guess it’s no surprise since the “gwai lo” (Chinese for white people) can’t tell if our eyes are opened or closed.” Little did he know, he had just passed one of the greatest obstacles in achieving his goals, and that this would prove to be the most important decision of his life.
Even now, he doesn’t fully understand what spurred him to do something like this. However, few know the reality behind the glowing smile that he always shows. Behind the façade, lies a turbulent past that still troubles him today. His actions are still reserved, for he tends to avoid socializing and lives a nearly reclusive lifestyle. Nonetheless, he has learned much from these times, and is wise beyond his years. He is always ready to share, and impart his knowledge upon others; but because of his passivity, no one realizes. It only takes a second of your time to start a conversation with this man, and from it, you can ascertain a lifetime’s worth of lessons. While reminiscing, Wong declared, “I guess that within everyone, there is a part of their lives that they wouldn’t mind forgetting. But yet, no matter how hard they try, they cannot bring themselves to erasing the memories of that time, for it is all part of who they are.” Who is Cheung Sheng Wong you ask? He was, he is, and forever will be, my grandfather.