Tags: crossing borders, dorms, enjoyment, friendships, outside of school, religious/secular
Warning: This is incredibly long. It was unintentional, I just kept typing! I’m really not as interesting as the giant mass of text would suggest.
I was also raised in an Orthodox Jewish background, so for the first paragraph of Sharon’s reflection, we’re very similar.
I was raised in Teaneck, New Jersey, in a big Jewish community. I went to a local yeshivah (Jewish Orthodox school) from kindergarten to 5th grade, when I switched to a different school in Riverdale, New York. (S/A/R, for anyone who cares.)
I feel my school did a pretty good job balancing out my Judaic studes classes (Hebrew, Prophets, Bible, Talmud, etc.) with my classic secular subjects of History, English, Science, Math, and so on. I enjoyed it so much, that when they opened up a new high school, I signed up for the first graduating class of S/A/R High School.
Being in the first class was really interesting. We started with only 68 students and all of the teachers were new. Some teachers were good, some never lasted beyond that first year. We became very tight-knit, bonding over the experience of being the “guinea pigs” of our administration. My day was from 8 to 5:10 every day, but I stayed most days for some extracurricular activity, which was a big part of my high school experience. I stayed drama, choir, newspaper, literary journal and floor hockey (ice hockey rules, played on a gym floor), which was my favorite sport ever, but doesn’t exist outside of our tiny league. I still miss it all the time. It was the first time I was really personally invested in a sport.
I actually found my administration very open about questions concerning our Judaism and identity, and the school tried very hard to balance both curriculums. I loved English especially, and was thinking about being an English major in college. While math was never my strongest subject, I had one teacher who was just so passionate about it that to this day I can never really hate math. I just feel incredibly frustrated when I don’t understand it.
Besides the double-curriculum, there was a twice-weekly class that was mandatory, but ungraded. We would divide into small groups (3-8 people) and learn some Judaic text that wasn’t in our regular curriculum. The point of this class was to learn Torah L’Shamawhich we roughly translated as “learning for the sake of learning,” not learning for a grade or a requirement. It’s an idea I’ve taken with me into my college years, and I audited a class last semester for fun, and I try to keep learning things (such as Japanese) on my own time, outside of the traditional classroom setting. I also try to take at least one class every semester for fun, as a rule.
I applied to the Honors College at Queens without really investigating what an opportunity it was, assuming that I wouldn’t get in. I actually applied to nine different colleges, and for a while Barnard College was my top choice. But I was wait-listed, and I found out that quite a few people from my grade were going to Barnard, and I wanted to go to college with a fresh slate and break out of my shell a little bit. So when the Honors College got back to me, I went to all of the events and chose to come here.
Then I decided, like many of my classmates, to take a year off and go to Israel to study in a religious school for a year. I chose a school in Jerusalem that was known for serious students and a lot of freedom, because I wanted a serious classroom environment but a fun atmosphere. That year was an amazing experience. Virtually all of the classes were “learning for the sake of learning,” in that none of these classes were really graded. We woke up and went to classes because we wanted to. The schedule was from 8:30 in the morning until 10 at night, with some breaks in the day for lunch and dinner and hanging out. I took classes in Talmud, Prophets, Bible, Halakhah (rules for things like Kosher) and other stuff like that. Being entirely self-motivated was incredibly hard, and there were days I wasn’t anywhere near 100%. We had trips to go hiking around the country with our teachers, and we went to teacher’s houses for Sabbath and other holidays. It was amazing to bond with teachers and other students on so many levels outside of the classroom.
It was my first time living away from home, which meant there was no one to tell me to get out of my bed unless I did it. I learned a lot about myself that year.
My best learning though, would have to be on the public transportation. Israel is a teeny little country, about the size of New Jersey, but it has a fantastic bus system. Unfortunately, my Hebrew wasn’t really up to par, especially at the beginning of the year. Learning how to use Hebrew to get around was a learning experience unto itself. People were incredibly helpful, and I learned all the ways to check with a bus driver to make sure he didn’t forget to remind me for my stop. (“Where is _____ stop?” “How many more minutes?” “How many more stops?” “Are we close?” “Is it next?”) My best experience was visiting my cousins in a little farming community a few miles from Sderot. The bus dropped me off by the side of the road and there was NOTHING in sight as far as the eye could see but my little bus stop. It was the perfect beginning to a horror movie. But I made it through that time, and all the other times I had to take buses to get places. I also figured out how to handle cabs when I needed them. During that year I went to a friends wedding, a cousin’s shiva house, up and down Israel for weekend visits to family and strangers, a week in Poland to learn about the Holocaust, 12 days in Europe over Spring break, you name it. I learned how to plan ahead, and how to handle myself in all sorts of crazy situations.
I found that living at school also taught me a lot about how to handle people and conflicts. My roommate was amazing from day one, but I had two suite-mates that I didn’t get along with at all. It took four months before I was able to switch rooms, but I learned a lot of skills I use with difficult people.
After that, my first year at Queens College was a big adjustment for me. I don’t know about Hunter, but at Queens, it feels like 99% of the students are in pure commuter-mode: show up to class, take class, leave campus. There was very little interaction between students before and after class, and the dorms weren’t built yet. I got an apartment with a friend and a girl I met through a posting on a mailing list. I had to handle food planning for the first time, and Macaulay was actually a lot less supportive then I was expecting. However the required Macaulay classes were one of the best things about my first semester. Not, mind you, because of the content, although seeing a bunch of plays in the city was amazing. But it was the only time I was in a class where I saw the same people multiple times a day. And we hung out in the lounge together, and spoke to each other, and now I know everyone’s name, and we hang out at seminars together. But those first few weeks were incredibly lonely.
But I got used to being in an apartment instead of a dorm, so when the dorm opened I chose to stay off-campus. I enjoy hosting meals and small movie-watching parties. I am the one who tries to arrange meals for the whole apartment on a nightly basis, and I try to keep up a cleaning schedule, although that’s my major weakness. I’ve learned that I tend to work better at the library than hanging out with my roommates at home, so I just stay on campus for some of my work.
I’ve also found at college that they are finally doing what my high school was always trying to do – most classes seem to overlap each other, the same information applying to different subjects. I’m always delighted when I sit in on a class and learn something that I’ve learned already in another field or subject. Sometimes I finally feel like college is getting me out into the world to learn what real life is really like. Sometimes I feel like I’m still in high school, though, where grades feel frustratingly useless and nothing I learn seems at all useful. I suppose only time will tell at this point.
Jacquie, when you say “It feels like 99% of the students are in pure commuter-mode: show up to class, take class, leave campus,” I can tell you that Hunter to me feels the same way. Outside of the Honors College, it seems like the only thing people do is go to class, and go home. The Honors college is a little better at socializing but, most of us are brought together by the dorms.
I can’t even tell you how much I envy you those dorms. I love the expansive Queens campus, the giant lawn, frisbee-tossing and what have you, but I wish we had more of a dorm atmosphere. (Yeah, at this point it’s my choice, but guess where I would choose to be living if Macaulay was paying for it?)
You went to SAR? You don’t happen to know Ayelet Parness, do you? Then again, I’m not entirely sure what grade you’re in… Also, considering you grew up in Teaneck, do you by any chance known the Lindenbaums? Hehe. Jewish Geography for the win.
Also, I agree with Vincent. The only reason I have a social life at all is because of the dorms. Like you said, the Honors classes also help. One of the reasons I chose to apply to Hunter was because of the dorms- I wanted a real college experience, something I didn’t think I would get from a commuter school.
Ayelet Parness? The name sounds incredibly familiar, but I can’t recall…I definetly don’t know the Lindenbaums, although my midrasha was renamed for them. 😀
By the way, I was class of ’07. (aka class of James Bond.)
I did not think I was coming to Macualay because I really and truly thought I wouldn’t get it, so I didn’t put an awful lot of thought into which college I chose. I don’t regret my decision, but I would have liked a dorm in my freshman year.