To Ms. Debbie Miller and Ms. Cindy Provost, current directors of Miss New York Teen USA:
I remember the excitement of receiving your event’s first letter very well, the shaking hands and tears because I thought “wow, I’m actually beautiful”, after years of degrading myself in the mirror. But, I should have known better. When I ran into my mom’s room and told her, I felt so confused by her lack of a reaction. Why was she not jumping with joy? Why did she not start crying too? Why was this moment the exact opposite every teen drama I had ever seen?
“They send that to every girl, don’t let them fool you” is what she said to me. And suddenly, I understood. You did not handpick me, I was not subjected to scrutiny of my Instagram or Facebook or other public photos, I was not, for lack of a better term, special. I was a naïve, young girl, with good social/economic standing, that you could use to benefit your organization through material and advertisement-based means. I would be lying if I said my confidence did not take a hit there, it was a harsh reality for someone who was looking for anything to make them feel desired. Simply put, it hurt. A lot, actually.
Currently, I am writing to you on behalf of all New York state young women with no money to pay your entry fee and a clear understanding that what you determine is beautiful is the only thing that matters in your competition. There are a lot of problems I have with you and I know there are a lot of problems other people have with you as well. Some of them have to do with my own insecurities as a female, exploiting young women for their physical appearance, and pretending you are not after the money of young women who want approval/validation of their appearance. Look, we all know you want a pretty face to represent you, why else would physical appearance account for 2/3 of the judging process? At that point, why even interview girls?
First of all, I have been receiving your unwarranted advertisement that claims I have been “chosen” to participate in your competition, for years now. If this were not a school assignment and I were not supposed to be handling this professionally, I would refer to these letters as a much less mature word for male cow feces. The only reason I am receiving your letters is because of the public information you have been able to acquire about me. You know nothing about me, you are only trying to get my money. This is clear by the entry fee you charge to compete.
“Oh, but the entry fee is covered by the scholarships!” Yes, they are, if I win. And if I don’t win? I owe you money that I may not have. Girls who receive these letters become so filled with hope, believing they have been handpicked by an elite group of people who looked through their photos or know who they are. So, they run in to compete, regardless of whether they have the money or not, because they think they have a real chance at winning, because you lead them to believe that they are truly special in terms of this competition. Of course, these girls may win, and I do not mean in any way that they do not have the ability to. But, the fact that you use such careful words like “chosen” can give girls false hope.
Furthermore, if I manage to get enough sponsors to pay my way into the competition, maybe even a little extra, you take all of the money. Yes, I looked through your FAQ, I am, in fact, doing my research. I am not blindsided with rose-colored glasses about being “chosen”, you are after the money I can make for you. If I make enough money for you, I get “material items” that will help me win the competition, like dresses, haircuts, accessories, make up, etc. So, what about the girls who do not get those benefits, who barely scrape by with the fee? Are they not at a disadvantage? Not every beautiful girl has pockets filled with cash, as you should know, female pant pockets are notoriously small.
Secondly, you are still telling women what they must wear in order to be considered beautiful. A young woman who showed up in sweatpants during the competition for the “athletic wear” portion, regardless of how beautiful/charismatic/lively/amazing she may be, will not win, because the judges cannot determine how “physically fit” she is with baggy clothes on. That’s actually disgusting. By walking out onto that stage, my female peers are subjecting themselves to being sexualized. Nobody sees the interview portion except the judges, nobody knows what the girls’ personalities are like when they are not trying to put on a show for a competition, nobody knows who they are other than a pretty face in form-fitting leggings and a sports bra, or evening gown. How can you claim that “Anyone can compete, there is no perfect body type” and then blatantly contradict yourself by saying, “You are being judged on how healthy and physically fit your body is”? Sure, overweight girls can compete, but they probably will not win.
Here is the problem with that: According to the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey (NHANES) from 2013-14, 1 in 6 children from ages 2-19 were considered obese1. In New York state, excluding NYC, 35% of students in middle/high school are obese2 and, including NYC, a third of children/adolescents are either obese or overweight. But, every time I look at photos from a Miss New York Teen USA pageant, I don’t see a girl above an average BMI for every three average or under BMI girls. I see: skinny, skinnier, little bit of body, and skinny again. Our nation is not made up of skinny girls, stop making women who do not meet your definition of beauty feel inadequate.
So, here is what I propose: get rid of the contradictory “every body type is beautiful, but you have to be physically fit/healthy to be competitively beautiful” mentality and stop baiting girls into competing without telling them what exactly they are getting into. Tell them what the entry/registration/sponsorship fees are right up front in the letter you send. Stop pretending that you are representative of every young woman in New York; you are very clear throughout your website that obese/overweight women who do not meet your standard of fit are not going to be able to progress very far. I find your hypocrisy incredibly unfair, as I am sure a lot of other young women do (a few are in my class). Why are you pretending to be all-inclusive and then directly contradicting yourselves? Either allow all women to compete and compete fairly, or stop acting like everyone has a chance to win, when it is very clearly rigged for the rich and tiny-framed.
Your competition has the potential for acceptance of all body types, you say that you believe all body types are beautiful and that there is no perfect body type, yet you exclude so many young women because their body type does not fit the competition. If you allowed all young women to compete, gave all of them a fair chance, your competition would be so much more appealing and it would help encourage young women who are not fit to love themselves. You could be an immense force for good in the world, for those young women. Instead of telling them how they should look and scorning them for how they do look, you could teach them to be happy with who they are and how they look. You could show that you don’t have to be under a certain size of dress to be beautiful.
Personally, I think that would encourage a lot of young women to take care of themselves. When a woman is told she will never surpass a certain point because of her weight, one is not only degrading everything she could be just based on a physical feature that may not be completely in her control (google search hypothyroidism), but also, potentially, destroying her self-confidence/self-esteem. This can leave a lasting impact, psychologically, which could lead to alcoholism, drug abuse, and/or mental disorders, like depression and body dysmorphia. But, if you tell a woman she can succeed, regardless of her weight and body, she will be more likely to try. Not only would this satisfy your pageant’s extravagance by bringing in more participants, the entire competition would be more diverse and exciting to watch because now there is an element of the real world in it.
I hope you understand my frustration with your inexplicit body-shaming and gradually mounting expenses, and thank you for taking the time to read my letter.
Sincerely,
Sterling Lipscomb
P.S. Every body type IS beautiful, but do you know what’s more beautiful? Seeing every body type represented, next to one another, in a message of true acceptance and equality.
References
https://www.health.ny.gov/prevention/obesity/
https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/health-statistics/overweight-obesity
https://health.data.ny.gov/Health/Student-Weight-Percent-Obese-by-Grade-Level-Statew/xjsc-2jcc
