It is interesting how universal this idea of domus is. My personal experience is very similar to Silky’s in that she could not talk back to her elders. Whenever I would go to family gatherings or occasions, my mom would remind me to greet the people who were older even if I had no idea who they were . The constant reminder has become so engraved in me that it is my second nature to automatically go up to my elders and say hello. However, it was very interesting to read these chapters because I feel that the domus of my family and that of the Italians worked in a different style.
When I first came to America, my extended family lived in the same house as my family did. My grandmother had purchased a three story house, which my entire family on my dad’s side shared. My grandparents lived on the second floor, my aunts/uncles on the third and my family on the first. However, although we all lived together, it was obvious how much we all wanted to move out. It was great to be with the family at first because it made things a lot easier. My aunts and my grandparents came a lot earlier, so they were already settled down. By the time my family came, we didn’t have to worry about the usual problems, such as finding a place to live or even finding a job because my grandmother already found openings for my parents. In this way, I feel that my family had a domus lifestyle out of ease and necessity rather than anything else.
For the Italians, however, I think that it’s completely the opposite. The domus lifestyle is practiced because the concept of family is very important. Like ToniAnn said, “To NOT be with them is a very strange thing to imagine.” I know this was definitely not the case for my family because as soon as my aunts and uncles had enough money, they all moved out. This is also why I think the festes are so important to Italian culture. During these festes, people really get to experience unity and family/friend bonding. Experiencing religious spirituality, of course, is also another reason why these festes were so prevalent. However, even when people prayed to the Madonna, the prayers usually concerned family.
This relates back to the point brought up by Alexa about how New York City is a contradiction. Although this idea of community is so strong in many immigrant cultures (that’s why we have ethnic neighborhoods), the idea of individuality is engraved in American culture. It’s a very interesting idea to think about.
