The Journey Here
Being a natural born citizen and having parents of ethnic descent, I often questioned my identity. Outside my home, in school, I felt American. I attended the same classes as everyone else, ate the same lunch as other kids, and played the same games. Going home was a completely different experience. I felt my Asian roots. It was a culture change, I watched shows in Chinese and ate foods that would often be considered “gross” by many other students. My family was also very different that those of my friends.
Going to school was a fun experience for me, it allowed me to interact with kids who shared similar cultures and others who didn’t. Becoming friends with people who come from all different backgrounds and social statuses was a very enlightening experience for me. Making friends however wasn’t easy. I was often questioned about my culture by some whose families have been living in America for a very long time. “Aren’t you a math genius” or “Do you eat dog” were questions I often received. This didn’t bother me as I accepted my nationality of being Chinese. I was proud of my heritage and embraced my distinct family background. I knew that while I was Asian, I was just as American as anybody else.
My mother is currently the owner of a small insurance company. She operates in Flushing, a densely populated area with a large population of Chinese and Korean Americans. My mom decided to have her office located here as she wanted to be in close proximity with people of the same ethnic group. She would be able to have lunch in an area that would give her a sense of nostalgia of the food from her childhood. She would be able to communicate in her first language comfortably and freely, being reminded of the place she once called home. Its been 30 years since she lived in New York, finishing high school, graduating college, and having a kid and a husband. Now, without a second doubt, she is able to call America her home.
I always questioned my mother why she decided to come to America. She had never been aboard a plane in her life yet she was willing to travel thousands of miles across the world to start a new life. She left her friends, her family and everything she had and came to a completely new and unfamiliar place. She always had the same response – to get a better life. My mother was the last of her family to leave Hong Kong. Her mother, father, and siblings have all left in order to escape the upcoming handover of the British territory back to China in 1997. They were afraid to be part of a communist nation where everything they had worked for would be diminished. My family wanted to continue to live in a capitalistic society and America seemed like a bright option. They wanted motivation for working hard and this would not be possible if they remained.
I never understood why she thought America was such a great place. I now realize she wanted to receive a college education, something that is very difficult to receive in Hong Kong. She wanted a job where she would be able to use her intelligence rather than her strength to make money. To use her skills in a place where they can be appreciated. My mother wished to see her child happy giving me the opportunity she didn’t have at my age.
Getting to this point in her life was certainly no simple task. And her achievement still shocks my family to this day. She was often bullied in high school due to her lack of English speaking skills. She felt threatened, unable to fit in with the rest of the environment. Back in Hong Kong, she was inadequately educated and struggled to adapt to the college system in America. My mother was the youngest of seven children and was the only one in her family to graduate from a university. After completing college, she worked as an insurance saleswoman for 15 years where she was able to earn enough money to start her own business. She was determined to make a change, setting a path for future generations to follow.
Coming to America also gave us the opportunity to celebrate new holidays. Traditionally Christmas was not seen as a huge holiday in Hong Kong and Thanksgiving was rarely celebrated. After my family immigrated here, we often found ourselves at friends and family’s homes talking, eating and enjoying each others company. We also paid less attention to the more traditional holidays having only one or two day festivities that were often a week long when back in Hong Kong.
The people in America were also very different than those in Hong Kong. My mother, while growing up has rarely had more than a two-minute conversation with her neighbors despite the cramped living spaces that were often found in Hong Kong. Having spent a good portion of her life in Long Island, she was often invited to gatherings and events by her colleagues and coworkers. This was a major culture shock. Rarely did strangers compliment each other and holding the door for the next person or saying “thank you” was certainly not a common gesture. This however, was not necessarily a bad thing. My mother managed to learn this new way of life fairly quickly from her college experience and through operating her business with American clients.
Being a first generation student and being born to an immigrant mother, I have been exposed to both my ethnic heritage and the culture and traditions in America. There are many differences between the two and my family has learned to appreciate the new culture. Moving thousands of miles away from your hometown is certainly no easy task and I can now understand why my mother was willing to make the journey. I am proud to be the son of an immigrant and being able to represent my individuality. My family and now can now comfortably call New York our home.
