Don Emiliano Family Potrait (fictional)

THERE:

Don Emiliano and his wife Dona Selena jointly decided things even in Mexico, and this shows that he held a less rigid “ranchero masculinity” even before migrating to the US. They decided to migrate to the US when they were “novios”( a committed relationship). We can see that Don Emiliano followed a relaxed version of “ranchero masculinity,” by getting involved with his family and understanding the views of his wife. Don Emiliano worked in the agricultural production in Ticuani, Puebla.

Wedding Parade, Angahuan

HERE:

Don Emiliano also works in a restaurant during the week-days, and is also involved in the Ticuani Solidarity Committee. Don Emiliano follows the alternative image of masculinity of a modern migrant. He also has frequent absences from home, but he has greater involvement in raising his daughters, and he also makes sure to include them in his work so that they can fully understand their father’s frequent absences and appreciate all the sacrifices he is making. The couple’s gender bargain was renegotiated when Don Emiliano adapted to the American context and this bargain helped Dona Selena to acquire some liberty as well. He understands his absence is a problem for his wife since she has a lot of things to handle at home. His absences are missed by his family, unlike Don Gerardo’s absences.

Don Emiliano forbids his daughter to date until she is twenty years old and his wife also agrees to his demands since Don Emiliano has involved himself in the family since the beginning and therefore is entitled to apply his authority. Don Emiliano takes his family back to Ticuani and they get a chance to see the results of the work their father puts in during the weekends in New York. They see new schools, better water systems and that their father has become a somebody in the Ticuani community. The “evolution” in his gender ideology came when Don Emiliano had to wear an apron at his work place and then he learned to ignore the views of the people back in Ticuani since he had crossed the line that separates men’s and women’s work, because he began earning money. He earned money that was impossible for a peasant in Puebla, and he could defend his gender identity against both the “‘machismo and ignorance’ of the ‘villagers’ and his own shame” (Smith, 110).

Mexican Restaurant Worker

He played an active role in raising his daughters by sending them to school in the mornings, taking care of them when they were babies. He involved his oldest daughter with him when he was collecting funds for the Committee. His life in New York required him to learn to cook and take care of his children while his wife went to work and he linked this with his evolution due to migration. He does not lament the lose of his gender privileges, but rather he values what he gained by living in New York. Don Emiliano quit his drinking because of his doctor’s urgings and also because his family asked him to.

Don Emiliano’s family describe his work in terms of honor and sacrifice for the pueblo that increased their own dedication to and status in the community. Dona Selena and her daughters do not attend public events, especially Mexican events, without the presence of Don Emiliano. The family is allowed to do household chores by visiting the grocery stores or going to the library. Dona Selena adopts two models, that is, both “ranchera” migrant woman by not letting her children attend public events or even go the public park, and also the Ticuani migrant woman by working and earning money needed to live in New York. She admits that the absence of her husband “bothered” her, but she did not voice her opinions and maintains a “ranchera” characteristic. Dona Selena’s notion of femininity also changes because she asks her husband to change his daughter’s diapers like it was normal thing for a father to do such a task while she cooked. Don Emiliano and Dona Selena have a companionate marriage, where elements of ranchero masculinity are consistent with the a respect marriage. Dona Selena maintains her “verguenza” qualities.